You know, all the pangas you face in this life, from a quarrel with the subjiwala over the rates of tinda to dropping your cellphone in a drain, can be classified in three distinct categories, ascending in order of their gravity.
The smallest and most chindi sort of pangas. Not very dangerous, if you remain as calm as a dead rabbit. let me explain you with example - Me entering home after drinking quarter bottle of Magic Moments Apple flavour.
Mummy : tere mhu se smell kesi aa rahi hai?
Me : nahi to
Mummy : pii k aa rha hai na?
Me : main kabhi nahi pita
Mummy : hmmm...
Then there is the little more jaanleva category of pangas. Still manageable, I would say, if you can put on a facial expression as wooden as John Abraham’s. A week later than the aforementioned incident involving me and my mother, me once again entering home after drinking half bottle of Magic Moments Apple flavour.
Mummy : aaj fir smell aa rahi hai
Me : kesi? Apple ki hogi....Appy Fizz pii hai maine
Mummy : hmmm...
But then, there is the biggest sort of panga, big enough to wipe out the dinosaurs upto the last inch of their tails, a panga scarier than Archana Puran Singh’s laughter on Dolby surround. The sort of panga which happens when one warm evening after the aforementioned incidents, me entering home again after drinking full bottle of Whisky this time.
Mummy : bahar nikal ja, aaj koi bahana nahi chalega, sab pata hai mujhe
Me : mayyyyeneeeee naaaaai pooiii....
But sorry, i was caught this time, i was feeling so frustrated, upset, angry, sad and my mom is not talking to me after this incident. So ladies, gentlemen and the members of ayepaisanikaalna (yaar ye jisne decode kiya na usko main apna sabse favorite song sunaunga :P, comments mei likhna.) , over the last 8 months, I have discovered that I have taken a panga with life, which belongs to the third variety. If I try to discover where to start, I will be busy discovering, so if I winzip the agenda, my life over this duration is represented fairly by one glimpse of the flashback ( Yes, you are supposed to read that in Black and White font.)
Venue: My boss’s cabin (Aloha Technology, Pune)
Me : "I dont wanna continue."
Boss: "You want to think again?"
Me (thought to myself- Anuj, think again. It has been proved that a man without money and job is mathematically equal to man without a girl within a radius of atleast Five kilometers): "No."
Boss : "I would say, give it a thought."
Me (thought to myself – So I need to get to a distance of more than 5 kilometers from myself to get married !) : "Nopes, I already have thought, I do not want to continue."
Boss : "Ok."
And with that two lettered 'Ok', I quit my first job, to join the vella group of this world again. I mean, picture this for a perspective – Every morning you walk to the ocean with a bucket, towel and lux ( aur kya ?) to take a bath, and then one day you decide to take a dip in the water accumulated inside a shoe. Or another view, you have been eating a cheeseburst pizza with oodles of toppings every day, and then one day you are supposed to burp after chewing your fingernails. Just as a demonstration of how ridiculously paagal I felt about myself. But I just had to do it. We spend all our lives being scared of “what if”, but once you walk out a situation you do not enjoy and face the fear, you discover it was not that bad. I mean, yeah, your parents will think you have been smokin weed and all the frnds who thought you were sensible would not even like talking to you, but you would not be scared anymore. I mean , you are facing it right there, so you are not scared of the future. I needed to do it so that I am not scared of the future. Makes sense? Not to most of the people around me, but it sure feels good.
So bhaiyya , the whole thing is, that job mein panga, and personal life mein panga. Watt itni lagee hai life mein ki kaano se smoke nikal aya, but watt lagne ke baad hee to the irons is converted into the golds !!! ( wow man, the day I am converted into gold, I would sell off an ear and buy myself a sportsbike ).
Life has been as dizzy as a polythene caught under a ceiling fan on full speed, but hopefully, I shall come through and survive like a strong polythene. Hopefully you guys will see me fighting it out, getting a stable job and life. And hence finding myself looking at a happy future of working 6 days a week and paying huge bills. Chalo aap log bhee kuch kaam etc kar lo, hope all of you face equally big jhatkas so that I feel nicer in comparison. Areee tension mat lo yaar, i m not like that, i always think positive for others.
